Archive for the ‘Gaming’ Category


LIMBO Xbox Live Arcade Game Review


I can say that this is one of the most unique games I have ever seen.

A boy wakes up in a forest. Ahead of him lies fear, uncertainty, death … and his sister.

A two-dimensional, side-scrolling adventure with a heavy emphasis on puzzle-solving, Limbo turns this time-worn gaming genre on its ear:

It’s presented in grainy, flickering black and white, with characters existing simply as dark silhouettes against soft-focus backdrops.

No health meters, no maps, no dialogue of any sort and very little music.

And yet it’s stunning, beautiful and unforgettable.

As the boy, you make your way to the heart of the matter, and to get there, you have to overcome a series of logic puzzles and enemies.

The developer, Playdead, doesn’t hammer you over the head with a story. Instead, it unfolds slowly as you make your way through the various sections of Limbo, from industrial wastelands to shadowy forests.

As you progress through the game, there’s an almost hypnotic, dream like quality to the whole world, as you’re immersed completely in it.

You don’t encounter enemies often, but when you do, they’re certainly memorable, whether it’s light-fearing brain ticks or one of the creepiest renditions of a spider I’ve seen in any medium.

Even the boy himself is nothing more than a black silhouette against a charcoal sky, and the only sign of life or character other than his motions is the whites of his eyes.

There is no colour – everything is black or white or shades of gray – and the only sounds are those you create by exploring and an occasional twang or random chord.

The game’s controls couldn’t be simpler: move using the analog stick, press A to jump and B for action/grab.

After just a minute of playing Limbo, it becomes clear that atmosphere and tone are the game’s greatest strengths.

While there are some very cool and clever puzzles a handful can stop the game dead in its tracks.

On at least three occasions, I discovered the solution to a puzzle entirely by accident –

running back and forth across an area until something triggered.

You’ll often die to things that you have no way of knowing are there until they kill you.The same goes for multiple-step puzzles.

For both, the lesson will cost you your life: Die and remember what to do next time.

There are two things that ease the pain. The first is that the checkpoints are evenly distributed and the loading times aren’t too bad.

The second is the death animations.

Horrifyingly dark, disturbing and violent – especially when you pause to consider that this is all happening to a child.

There is one point in the demo, were your stuck in some sort of slime type trap, only to realise that a few seconds later a horrifying creature comes out of nowhere above you to… stop the demo and force you to pay for the game it’s that hooking.

Overall It’s a Hauntingly beautiful game, well worth paying £15 pounds (1200 Microsoft points) for.


So everyone on xbox, get to the Marketplace, and download the demo. I want you all to come back to the poll that I’m placing on my blog and review the game for yourselves!


So I actually completed the game and can make a rough assumption on what you’re buying.

The game had me in a few tough spots, all of them took me the best part of an hour to complete.

There could of been many more puzzle’s to complete in the game itself (Roll on DLC!)

After completing it however I felt rather cheated.

There could of been more emphasis on more puzzles that should of been much harder, and I find that I unlock a small animal like creature for my avatar, which makes me pause to think.

Is that what I payed for?

Because the animals in the avatar marketplace are at least 800Microsoft points. So maybe that’s what came with the price of the game (1200 M Points). The game being worth £5 pounds maybe?

All of this has made me change my standing on the game. Everything else is still perfect.

Overall It’s a Hauntingly beautiful game, but I don’t think it’s worth paying £15 pounds for.

Not that I regret purchasing it of course.


Categories: Gaming, Reviews Tags: , , ,

18 Ways To Be A Bastard In Games Part 3


Niko dies mid-crime spree.

You’re annoyed and want to vent.

Rockstar happen to respawn him in a nearby hospital, laden with patients napping on their guerneys….

The words ‘shooting’, ‘fish’ and ‘barrel’ come to mind.

Oh, and ‘bastard’.


BioShock maps child murder to a button press; you don’t have to look hard for evil.

The bastard, however, celebrates unnecessary evil.

Both BioShock and its shinier sequel supply you with a Pick ‘n’ Mix of torturing abilities – less pink foam prawns, more bee attacks.

For our money (salvaged from a nearby dustbin, naturally) it doesn’t get better than the electro-bath.

Set a Splicer aflame with the incinerate plasmid and just as he jumps into nearby water, fire an electro bolt into the shimmering wetness. The notion that he sees his fate buzzing before him is most pleasing.


 With my recent “10 tracks to hear this week“.

I must add a little red dead redemption into the mix of bastardly deeds.

So here’s my favourite, what we need to do is hogtie a helpless civilian, extra bastard points for a civilian of female origin.

Place her onto your horse and ride to the nearest train track (providing there is no law enforcements on you).

And lay your unsuspecting victim straight right. slap. bang. in the middle of those deadly tracks!

Extra Bastard points for putting your bandana on before you commit this unsightly deed.

More to come, including CRACKDOWN, SAW, GODFATHER II and more!

Portal 2 Revealed At E3

“Oh, it’s you…”

“It’s been a long time. How have you been? I’ve been really busy being dead. you know… after you murdered me?

Okay look, we both said a lot of things that you are going to regret. But i think we should put our differences behind us. For science. You monster”

– Gladis

When Valve approached a team of students from the nearby digipen institute of Technology with job offers and the opportunity to flesh out their senior project – Narbacular Drop – back in the summer of 2005, it did so cautiously. Measured steps were taken to minimize risk. The team was kept small. Art assets were reused, drawing heavily from prefabricated pieces of the Half-Life universe. Then the final product, Portal, was released as part of the “Orange Box”

The investment paid off. With over 70 industry honors, and 30 game of the year awards, it’s impossible to deny portals success.

Portal was, and still is, unlike anything else in valve’s stable of action-centric titles. Valve knew it had something special, but didn’t anticipate the degree to which fans would gravitate toward the budding franchise. Their only complaint? They wanted more.

“Portal was so short because it was a trial” explains Doug Lombardi, vice president of marketing at valve to E3. “We paired it with [Half-Life 2] Episode 2 and Team Fortress 2, which were recognizable and safe. Then we had this portal thing, and we had no idea if people would dig it, even though we thought it was a cool idea. So it was put out there safely in the Orange Box, and the results came back wilder than we could have ever imagined.”

It didn’t take long for legions of valve fans to embrace it. Within months, “the cake is a lie” memes were all over the web, valve started receiving videos of  high school choirs singing “Still Alive” and the song even found its way into the Rock Band catalog. “There was no way we could have planned for it,” says Lombardi “So we knew we had to double down and give them more.”

Portal was a test bed.

Portal 2 is a game.

The trial by fire is over – the safety net removed. portal’s endearing antagonist, quip filled dialogue and mind-altering gameplay are proven commodities. A rabid fan base is established. Now it’s time to up the ante. Instead of merely hoping for the best, valve is now banking on Portal 2’s success.

The cake is a lie / Still Alive credits song

E3 interview with Doug Lombardi & hands on demo

Grand Theft Auto IV – Majestic Pent House

So many people are saying, this isn’t a secret.

But screw you it’s hard to get to on multiplayer!

This video isn’t mine (courtesy of PokeWizKev826)

– Obtain A Helicopter

– Fly To Nickel St. Shown as the red and black dot On This Handy Little Map;

-Make A Shoddy Attempt At Trying To Drop In

– There you have it!

Maybe The Video Would Make More Sense…




More Things To Do soon!!!

18 Ways To Be A Bastard In Games Part 2

So Continuing from the last post. Let’s get those bastard points up!

4. Modern Warfare 2 – One Man Bastard

Most of these malicious tips see you preying on helpless AI.

Want to be a more of that evil kind of bastard?

Get on to modern warfare 2 online!

There’s a new sensation doing the rounds guaranteed to vilify you in an instant.

It’s n00btubing –

the art of clumsily killing enemies with rampant grenade launcher use

– but a potent new strain of n00btubing.

With the One Man Army perk equipped you can change classes mid-fight – when the n00btube runs out of ammo, simply switch to the same class to restock.

Infinite grenades?

Bastard get!

Recently, the tactic at least became challenging due to a patch that increases your class swap time with each swap during a single life. Your bastardly intentions become more difficult the longer you attempt them.

5. Fable II – Consider this, a divorce.

Wives, eh?

Can’t live with ‘em, can’t murder them without accruing evil points.

Time to call in a friend to kill your wife. In co-op mode, the second player takes the bad karma by doing the deed and you stand idly by, dreaming of all the buxom young wenches you can now obtain.

Delete the second player and the world is none the wiser.

It’s basically the plot of Strangers on a Train.

For extra bastard points, take control of the second player and do her in like a split personality psycho killer!

6. Red Faction: Guerilla – Bomberman!

We could have filled our night of bastardry with civilian killing in sandbox games.

So unnecessary and yet so compulsive… A bit like Val Kilmer.

Guerrilla devs Volition are no strangers to random torture impulses, programming in a brilliant panicking animation should you stick a remote charge to a civ’s head.

Arms flapping, they screech around in the dust like a child chased by a bee.

Only it’s not a bee.

It’s a giant metallic charge clamped to their face.

Prolong the fear as long as your bastard gland so desires and push the button.

You… You evil people!

More to come, including GRAND THEFT AUTO IV, BIOSHOCK, RED DEAD REDEMPTION and more!